Thursday, 30 July 2015

Erectile Envy and Gas Pump Ejaculate on a Vibrantly Neutral Canvas

I saw a commercial for some new drug, at least, I think it was a drug, the other day which will: improve my health, make friends for me, do my taxes, lend me money, purify the air around me before I inhale, and build muscle tone.... I think... Honestly I'm not sure what the drug was intended to do based on the commercial, but I intend not to find out. If only it would make coffee for me in the morning I might be more interested.

I laugh because I've run out of tears to shed over the death throws of this dying age of material overload. Not that I recall having cried over it's impending departure at any point since learning Santa wasn't real but I can't think of a better metaphor to illustrate my distain for the world painted around me in vibrant hues of black and very dark grey. I know that knowing none of it is important is the important part, and persist in trying to illustrate this in new ways in hopes that it eventually makes sense to others still trapped and enticed back into the thrall of a new car cure for penile dysfunction and erectile envy. Maybe, some day...

In the meantime we know that $150 a barrel oil caused the great recession and so did $50 a barrel oil, because they've told us so. It may not be my place to disagree by pointing out other possibilities, but being me all these years has taught me that the bank owns my place so I don't really have one anyway. While I'm pointing in the direction of dinosaur flatulence, there's also this going on and I can only guess it's happening because someone said $50 a barrel was gone forever so a firmware update on the pumps now causes a kernel dump if they drop below a certain amount per litre.

I wonder if a BSOD on a gas pump causes an explosion? I would think it very possible given that training exercises can, and often do, so why not blame technology? I mean, it was built to support a broken and backwards system which is already causing many misfired synapses among organic brains, hence the need for the previously mentioned drugs that do.... I still don't know what...

Sure, let's simply blame the technology for the infidelity of the, must be corrupted, data or did I mean politicians instead of data... Sounds somehow correcter, yet I'm not sure making up words makes it more so <grin>. That I have more faith in a hacker's recently open-sourced data than I do in politicians or media has to say something about the state of the counterfeit Monet pulled over the eyes of those too distracted reaching for that brass cock-ring that's likely attached to a grenade pin. Boom!

I bet they never saw they had it coming either... Or, at least they won't have when it does. Some say that's in October, but like all things that haven't yet happened, we'll see...


P.S. Baby parts! Get yer fresh honey-roasted baby parts!

Sorry, I couldn't resist.


  1. We most certainly are living in a profoundly sick society and I am happy to say I am not adjusting well to it at all. If you read the comments on the end of the cbc gas article there are so many comments that say our government should do something to protect the consumer. They still believe that they live in a county that isn't fascist. Just because the corperations lets them have the illusion of choosing a government they believe it will make some difference. They continually do the same thing (vote) over and over and actually believe it will someday make some difference, Now that's how insane(or stupid) we've become. Whenever I get a call from some party or survey during elections I tell them the truth, I don't vote cause it makes no difference and it only encourages the bastards.
    You need to be careful now going for a checkup or at the hospital since if your healthy you could become an unwilling donor to save others. There is more money in harvesting one to save five or six.

    1. I go about that differently, I vote by filling in all the boxes with a sharpie.... This exercises my right to vote none of the above. As for hospitals, I go only to visit others.